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I have the lips of a thousand thrice-twisted elevator women.
Just thought I'd let you know.
I wonder if God made monkeys just so that we could all have a good laugh. I can't see any other purpose.
I still say it's possible to make rope out of something other than the sorts of things people have been making rope out of.
I mean, let's give it a try, people. Don't give up so quick.
I realized I'm not really fat so much as dumb.
Tomorrow I'm getting the index finger on my right hand replaced with a robot claw. The surgeon says that the claw's pretty big so they may have to remove my other fingers so that it can fit. Whatever.
I found a frozen monk in my wall. I think he must have been doing some kind of ancient monk trick to walk through my wall, and then he accidently got stuck. No idea how he got frozen though.
Kermit the Frog never had any kids. I guess things didn't work out with Miss Piggy?
My brother told me he's now officially obsessed with the process of raising a special breed of sheep called a Spottish Ham. He bought a farm in Massachusetts and plans to move there asap. He says he'd appreciate my support but if I won't give it, he won't care.
I hate these new breakfast cereals they are making for the new generation of kids. Did you see these? You're expected to fashion a spoon to eat the cereal using only the items found in the box. I tried it out. Got a little blue action parachute man, a package of skittles, and a tube of glue. How am I supposed to make a spoon from that? It sucks.
I have been looking into curdling. I don't see why I too can't be curdled.
